Making What Matters to You Matter

Hello Friends!

I hope you are well and everyday brings something new you have noticed about what is going well and what needs your attention with your relationship with food.

What I am noticing out there from what you are telling me is that you are cranking hard to get more grounded and put this food and body worry stuff behind you.

That you get that all food and body talk, desires to diet, worries about what others think is about something that is feeling too big, too much or too fast; or maybe not enough.

This might be too much to do and not having boundaries with what diet culture says or what others think based on their own food and body worries.

Or that there are so many things happening at once or external things changing.

And not enough time or so it feels, to eat the food you want, know what you want or let yourself have it.

What I am hearing is that all of that is getting better and you are getting in a groove of self care, getting more attuned to body signals and hating/fearing the body less.

Woohoo!! Please give yourself credit and celebrate. We don’t do this enough.

AAAND….

I’m also hearing…

Ugh, I’ve got to be in a swimsuit for the kids playdate

or

We are moving and it’s good but I’m overwhelmed

or

I know what I want but people will notice if I gain weight/eat in front of others/change in some way and I think they are judging.

This where you are telling me ” I LOSE MY FOOTING”

“I panic and it all becomes about the food and weight again.”

Today I want to share with you a quick way you can catch yourself from clinging onto food rules/beliefs that you aren’t okay if you are visible that cause you to forget about the present moment and your goals and values of how you want to live this one precious life.

1) Please, love, don’t judge that that you are freaking out about wearing a swimsuit/eating what you want in public/ fill in the blank…

2) Bring a protector/advocate to the part of you that is scared. It is easy to feel like you “shouldn’t feel how you feel” or that once you do the thing you will be fine. That may be true. But it doesn’t necessarily stop you from saying no to food or hiding yourself.

When we are afraid, we need comfort. Think of someone who you feel safe with, who is solid, consistent and you would happily eat anything with. Maybe there are more people like that too in the here and NOW.

This brings us to,

3) Reaching for your resources.

Just like we just did together above, you reach for your internal and external resources. Externally that might be:

Reaching out to family/friends for reassurance that taking risks is good
Petting the dog
Listening, Looking, Touching, Smelling your favorite things
Taking time to ground yourself with your weighted blanket, hammock, hot water bottle or other sensory tool you like

And finally,

4) Locate your Values

Recovery is hard for everyone. We need reasons to meal by meal, face feelings, beliefs and sensations that are uncomfortable to face.

However, you are here because you have something life affirming that you care about.

So review….. Why are you going to the picnic?

Headed to the pool or beach with your kids/grandkids?

Want to be visible and connect with others?

If you can hang onto the desire to be in safe relationship, be there for others and have others be there for you, live fully, have food be in it’s proper place to nourish and be enjoyed, then being willing to do 1-3 above makes sense to take time to do.

So remember, keep stock of making matter what matters most.

Is it your health?

Being with people you care about?

Do what brings purpose to you in this one short life?

I’d love to hear from you.

What adventures do you want to be having with food and life? And what tools above can you use to keep yourself grounded to move forward?

Warmly,
Tracy

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