Fullness is not the threat… 

One of the things that sneaks up on folks is the reality, that for real, we must legitimately practice eating from hunger and fullness, not just think about it. 

So that means if you are under-eating, you might need to find some gentle structure that will get your body and mind healed to be able to have accurate hunger and fullness signals.   

If you aren’t in substantial eating chaos (under- or over-eating or cycling between the two) you may be able to start directly with more hunger and fullness-based eating. 

I want to also caution you before I forget this deceptive mindset that gets many: are you saying you are eating from hunger and fullness but really turning the ideas of competent eating into another diet? 

You might be giving yourself permission to eat a bigger variety but not actually more volume. 

All of this side-steps this reality. 

Most of us who have dieted or even want to diet often have a war like attitude towards fullness, like it is enemy. 

We don’t have to go deep to know why. 

If we eat more food, we eat more calories.  And if you don’t want to see your body change after a lifetime of trying to be smaller to not get hurt, fullness means you are by default entering into what feels like the threat – a bigger or different body. 

Here are a few questions for you:

  • How much more of your life do you want to use food restriction as a tool to deal with the projections, prejudices and fears of others? 
  • Even if you do have to risk rejection, what else can you trust to help you navigate this?   

Because fullness is not really the threat, but it sure makes us get out of denial about what we believe and puts the mirror to our faces about how we might want to navigate this world differently now that we are older, know more and have more abilities and resources, despite what our feelings tell us sometimes. 

I say this with so much love.  I remember how scary and frustrating facing all of this was.   I alternated with feeling crushed, to anger to denial in the same day sometimes.  So I had to hear it again and again. 

Fullness is not the threat.  And it’s good if what I am saying makes you mad or upset. 

Let those feelings get you curious and help you be set free, versus anyone making you do anything that isn’t in your here and now values or desire to want.  Fullness and satisfaction are good for you, but you have to know that inside, not someone convincing you.  

I just know when I started this journey, I didn’t want to be held captive to my feelings about food and body, I wanted the truth and to build skills to live by so that WHEN, not if, people project their stuff, I would be okay. 

I have lots more compassionate witnessing to offer here: